you know what?
i've got loads of stuff to get off my mind.
some are rants, some are the routine exccessive thinking that i always do.

oh.
anyway, i concluded that thinking is bad for me.
i thought too much today and almost cried in the middle of the street while walking to the halker centre for lunch.

putting that aside first, there was this kitten we(me, jayne and kimberly ong) met while on the way to lunch. it was just lying there on the covered pathway minding its own business when i felt like talking to it. i talk to every meow i meet. yup. most of the time they'll stare at me and/or run away. this is the third meow so far that meowed back to me when i meowed at it. i wished i knew what i was saying and what they were replying.

so anyway, i was like wait stop. i wanna talk to that cat. and i went meow. then the little kitty looked at me. then i meowed again. then it meowed back. then i meowed again. then it meowed back and started towards me. and then we all sarted meowing happily ever efter. lol. the little kitty went like around our legs, arching its back and curling its tail around my leg. when i bent down to pet it, its fur/hair/whatever was like so soft la. softer than a teddy bear. then it lay down and stretched and did a roll over thing. it really made me go awwww.




see. i know some aren't that clear but my phone camera's a still camera. so yup.
doesn't it make you go awwww??
awwww.

*grins*

ok. now the part where i start ranting.
small kim's getting on my nerves.
like. every morning, when i wait for sonya at the bus stop, if she's early and sees me there, she'll go like "where's sonya?" like what does she expect me to answer? having sex with her neighbour? i'm not sonya's boyfriend. why do i have to know where she is? even if i am a guy and am sonya's boyfriend, i dont have to know where she is every single waking moment of the day. and even if i do know where she is, what has that gotta do with you? you have her number, so call her. plus its a dumb question to ask cos she usually comes with sonya in the same bus and thus should know that if i'm there, i'm obviously waiting for sonya which equals to she isn't there yet cos i'm waiting for her. like duh.
and then she sticks with sonya, walking beside sonya which leaves me either in front or behind. as a result, i'll listen to my mp3, pretending i dont care. and when nikkihlah comes and sonya goes over to her, she'll come walking beside me.
and today after school, i waited for sonya to go lunching. then small kim came and asked "what time sonya dismissed?" like. if i'm there waiting for her, obviously she's coming out right. and then when sonya came out, she went all clingy to sonya. so i left them alone and went over to jayne's class to wait for her. and when jayne came out, small kim came over and sonya was nowhere in sight. like. who do you wanna go with? make up your mind.

i am so sick and tired of being the extra one.
i'm not used to going out in groups.
and i dont like to.
because i always feel left out.

and that was what i was thinking too much about. about me not being there and it wouldn't make a difference. i dont like thinking. its bad for my health.

whats good for health is youghurt and bananas =)



teehee.
i love bananas. maybe thats why i'm bananas. =P i got the maid to buy a bunch for me when she went to the market cos my mens came on thursday and joanne said that banana's good for mens. plus i havn't eaten it in a week(it felt like ages).
so she bought a bunch today. and because i didn't tell my mum that i asked the maid to buy bananas for me, my mum bought another bunch =) i can have banana for breakfast, lunch and dinner =) yippie!
two bunches of bananas makes charlene a very happy girl.

as for youghurt, i will be swearing off plain youghurt after i finish the tub in my fridge. plain youghurt aint what i used to remember how it used to be. i used to love plain youghurt when i was in kindergarden. simply adored it. then for some unknown reason, i slowly stopped eating it. so i thought i'll revive the old days. i went to buy a tub of youghurt on my own. it tasted spoilt. so i threw it away. six eighty! my mum bought another tub. the same brand. it tasted spoilt. again. then my mum was like. "aiyah! i know why already." then she pointed to the word lite. lol. like. when i first bought the youghurt, i thought lite means litre in malay. turns out to be light. =P i bought another tub. different brand. marigold. it tasted slightly better. but not how i remembered what youghurt used to taste like. oh well. i guess i'll just stick to youghurt with fruits.
=)



my bra strap snapped again. the thing that connects it to the bra snapped for the second time. have to go get another one and sew it back. grrr. i dont like sewing bra straps. too tedious.

oh. did i mention that my days of bloodiness came on thursday? i didn't go school. dad's not really happy about it. but. i always refuse to go to school of the first day of my period. the cramps are really bad.
so today, i had blood stained panties cos i was simply too lazy to change my tampon when the four hours are up. my heavy days can only take out four hours on tampons. six for regular days.
and i was thinking about what would happen if i didn't sit properly and some guy saw my blood stained panties. then i came out with a rebuttal. "what are you looking at? if you're jealous of the blood on my panties, i'll chop off your dick so you'll have blood on yours too. then you'll know what its like to have menses." =P see. i think too much.

mrs theseira said i was disturbed. she was doing some letter writing and we had to describe the salesman. i went. "thick tuffs of pubic hair lined his underarms." then i grinned. and then theseira looked at me and said i was disturbed. :D

drama was okay. i think it would have helped loads if the instructor looked more like a manhunt contestant rather than some uncle who stays at home, eat, sleeps, watch soccr, beer, eat, beer, watch soccer, beer, sleep....
and he's not sharon. =(

and to you know who.
i know we're drifting. but. i dont know what to do when other people are around you. i think you know the left out feeling pretty well. but its more of the extra feeling that i always get. like you guys talk and i dont know what to say. so i just keep quiet.

i have tuition tomorrow. homework not done, eyelids closing.
God bless me.